Tuesday, July 8, 2014: Real Life Beauty

I went for a walk-jog this morning and will repeat each day this week as Ray is our normal morning dog-walker but he’s under the weather right now.  It was cool and bright and beautiful outside this morning and my whole body felt like it was absorbing the freshness in the air and injecting that freshness right into my mood.  After our outing, Gracie chilled on her mat by my feet and I had a coffee and rocked on my bench outside.  We even saw a hummingbird go zipping by!

These beauties grow wild just behind my parking spot at work.  Scissors + tall glass of water = instant happy.  And free!

These beauties grow wild just behind my parking spot at work. Scissors + tall glass of water = instant happy. And free!

I wanted to share this post from Beauty Redefined (www.beautyredefined.net) because it is the basis of how I am learning to treat myself better. 

 BRedefined

Their website was the impetus behind unlocking the door that holds my “real” self inside and letting her out.  The self that deserves love and respect, always.  The self that doesn’t abuse herself mentally over food or weight.  The self that asks for help and prioritizes taking care of herself.  Not later when I’ve run 10km.  Not later when I’ve lost 20#.  Not later when the gym is built or I have more money or I’ve had a boob job.  Right now.  The now that is occurring at every second of every day.  If I really believe that I will deserve more respect and love 20# from now….then by default does that mean that until that happens I have to accept whatever anyone wants to throw at me?  If I believe that my boss will respect me more or reward my efforts more when my boobs are bigger, then by default that means that as a human I deserve nothing….as a pair of breasts I deserve everything.  Bit backwards, ya?  If I really believe that I will be happier with $5,000 in the bank and a tropical vacation under my belt then by default that means that until that happens I’m destined to be miserable, no happiness.  If I don’t love myself then it is impossible for me to believe that Ray loves me; he’ll never win.  No matter how much or how often he shows or tells me that he cares about me and wants me and needs me it will never, ever be enough to convince me.  That’s my issue and one that I am actively working on……….by not believing that I need to be fixed or altered or corrected in order to be loved and respected and valued.  The old Dr. Phil thing is right, you teach people how to treat you….and more, you teach yourself how to treat you. 

I wanted to share that post…and encourage any woman who has ever felt like they don’t match up to what the “ideal” woman looks like or behaves like, to go and check out the website.  And really look at the lies that we’re being fed all day long.  Really listen to who is saying it and what they are trying to get you to believe and for what purpose.  There is no standard, there is no ideal, there is no bar to measure up to.  There is only us, our wants, needs, hopes, dreams. The rest of it does not matter…..it is designed and driven by enormous corporations who do not give a shit about the women they are marketing to or how they feel.  They are trying to sell you something that, no matter how much time, money or effort you put in, you will never get.  Ever.  They are selling you the idea that you are not good enough as you are.  No one should be buying that bullshit.

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