Week Four. Jesus. Seriously? Four weeks? A frigging month of this? A month of doing nothing but work and sleep. And the work I’m doing? Ultimately putting a lot of people out of jobs. Not cool. Feels horrible in so many ways.
Today? Done. Oh, the strike is still going on and there’s still MOUNTAINS of work to do. But I was just reminded (thanks Universe) that no one cares as much about me or my health and wellbeing as I do. THANK YOU! Thank you jerkface company that just jacked me out of 12 hours of earned overtime. THANK YOU, because I am done with this BS.
This weekend I Was Sick. Every bone in my body was aching, I slept for HOURS every day and then for at least 12 hours every night. I kept looking in the mirror and seeing myself descending into somewhere I do not want to be and not knowing how to stop it. Gratefully, today I got screwed………and now my eyes are Wide Open. It’s not to my benefit to work 11 hours a day and then fire up the laptop and work from home and then spend every hour of the weekend tied to a company phone that never stops ringing. Not to my benefit at all, actually to my complete detriment!
I don’t mind that they stole 12 hours of time back. It reminded me that the only thing to my benefit is my 7.5 hour day that earns my paycheque….and the rest of my life. The things that are important to me. Being well rested, being properly nourished, being active, being nice, being hydrated, feeling good, looking good.
Sure….it’s only been a month….three weeks of strike and a week before that of prep……but it’s beat the shit out of me and today I call Uncle. I realized that I’m not where I want to be in life right now in a few aspects…….there are only one or two that I can do anything about and if I don’t put some action into them then they continue to go in a direction that doesn’t work for me.
Tonight I’m going to take my dog into the trails for a 3.5km walk-jog (probably more walk than jog given how long it’s been) while Ray takes my car and fills it up with fuel. Tomorrow I’m getting up and going to the gym for an hour. Warm up, goblet squats, assisted pull-ups, lat pulls, abs. Good God I’ve missed the sounds of that!
I’m mentally exhausted, physically out of shape and emotionally drained. Only shoving myself through this temporary obstacle course gets me to the other side though so I have some “sucking it up” to do and some “push harder” to do. Good thing I’ve been on that road before and and know that it brings good things! I’ve let this huge obstacle carry too much weight in my life and I’m resizing it effective immediately.
Thank you, work shit head, for revoking 12 hours of my life. I hereby revoke my life from you!