….all of you….because you’re pretty much all the same as far as some things go.
A) Buy your wife or girlfriend flowers or chocolates or yarn or bedding plants or a magazine or a bottle of wine at LEAST every couple of months. It makes her feel good and it does not matter WHAT you went out and got (or made if you’re the crafty sort), it matters that you thought about her long enough to formulate a plan and that you care that whatever it is that you got her/did for her will make her happy. Do this regularly, but especially if your wife or girlfriend has spent/spends a SIGNIFICANT amount of time and effort taking care of you and yours.
B) Kiss, hug, pat, rub, tickle, snuggle your wife in a NON sexual way without expecting sex and even when she’s not naked. It makes us feel good that you want to touch us, even when you’re not about to get laid. It makes us feel loved and pretty and desirable. It reinforces that you actually want us to be there with you. And WE LIKE IT!
C) Attempt to see things from our point of view. We see things more emotionally than you do, so if you tell us that you can’t go to the movies with us because you’re broke or you have a headache or you just don’t feel like it….it shouldn’t be difficult to figure out why we get mad if you go golfing the very next day. We don’t see it as turning our suggested outing down, we see it as you rejecting us as a person.
These are some simple guidelines that take very little effort on your part and do a world of good for your relationship. They make us happy and they make us want to do things for you and make your lives easier. They put us in a good mood and sometimes they put us in The Mood. And if you aren’t doing these things? If you’re not only not doing them but you’re heading in the exact opposite direction? Well, that makes us resentful and upset and bitter…remember I mentioned that we’re emotional? Doing is positive and on the upslope. Not doing is not neutral, it’s the equivilant in most cases of being downright mean to us.
Finally, let me reassure you that this is not an excuse for the woman in your life to demand things and presents all the time. This should/can cost you next to nothing and it is immeasurable in the value to your spouse.